Thursday, November 26, 2009

Funny Bees

The following are utterances that were unintentionally humorous. Besides being erroneous, they offer the mind absurd images. Correcting them would be sinful!

(sharing a recipe) '.... then you chop the onions and smash the potatoes.'

'....add the chopped tomatoes and caspicum.'

'There is a force is There.' (a physics teacher long ago)

'Anu, you became so darky, you were so fairy.' (A North Indian relative.)

(Sitting down at the dining table) 'mmmm .... food! I am ravishing!'

'Bejaavo! Bejaavo!' (the P.E teacher who got locked in the gym. Mallu, of course.)

'I talking. He talking. Why you middle middle talking?' (another P.E teacher from another S.Indian state.)

'Kuch kuch hota hein.' ( My good friend, a Hindi-disabled physics teacher, looking into the eyes of the hindi speaking electrician, trying to explain that something weird happened each time some equipment was switched on)

'I am sure we will have good mammaries that we will go to and go back to.' (from a speech at a seminar)

'Her penis lost.' (from a student's note book.)

'The Nair families of Kerala followed the matriarchal system.' (a goal at my own post)


Anush said...


u guys r nairs???

u know shobhana? :P give intro no??? big big fan i am...

Materialmom said...


Yes, we are Nairs.

Yes, I know her. She may not know me :)

Actually she is related to me by marriage but I've not met her myself. Will Vineeth do?

ThalassicReverie said...

That was fun :)

'Kuch kuch hota hein..' I know this physics teacher ? :D

Materialmom said...


Thank you :)
Do I have to answer that question? :)

AtomicGitten said...

Fun post. Am reminded of Jagathi's famous "mujhe maloo eh-eh" :D

Materialmom said...

Yes, and his 'dushmen', 'jagada jagada' line :)

pawpaint said...

classic! :D Some of these verbal slip-ups have become so common now that I've even stopped noticing them. I no longer have even the remotest urge to giggle at "You have to enter through the backside."


Nice one there.

you could have included: "this this sir; up up sir; zwaing zip sir!"

and "Ammas kindees wellams kondaas!"

or "Even I can speak English: A, B, C, D . . . . "

What abt the telegram that read: "Raaji gave birth to a boy; boy is a girl!"

How abt: " . . . he works hardly . ."

I guess you have to stop some where.

Materialmom said...

hahahaha I can't not giggle.

True, those are classics :)

Anush said...


of course not! and what wil i tell him?

"hello vineeth! such a big fan i am... i even have ur photo as a wallpaper!" ?

i wont kno who wud be more embarassed then... me, vineeth or u - for giving me the intro...

Anush said...

and i hope all's well there :)

Materialmom said...

Terribly sorry, I completely forgot that you had Sreesanth on your wall paper...:)

Why? I am determined to be well. Nice of you to ask.

``black light`` said...

our newly appointed chemistry teacher had come directly from the malluland..he's got such an authentic manglish that our giggles were/are never out of stock..seems like his accent has been embedded into our heads in a way that it's hard to spent 6 hours straight without mimicking him even if it is under his nose..
last year it was our sst teacher mr.britson saying "by who the wat the wen the"! and now it is mr.sojan with his "zo! w-wa-wat d-d--discussing and all? i not liking this and all..u r scientists and all..u must be systematic and all aayy..

Materialmom said...


Hey, It's good for you - Suppressing giggles will keep you awake in class, and you'll NEVER forget the lessons that get embedded in your head along with the accent :)